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An Apple a day keeps the doctor away

It has been found that people who own iPhones visit the doctor less often. Not because they are healthier, but because they just don’t have enough money left to pay for the visit.

While iPhone owners have no regrets about their $1000 brick, they are often found playing Angry Birds while waiting in line for their food stamps to help them live from month to month.

Now, there is nothing wrong with this picture. Why shouldn’t someone spend hundreds of dollars on a phone before they feed themselves? There can’t be anything wrong with that. Not at all.

If I were a parent, I would definitely want to make sure that I could show off my shiny iPhone 6+ with 128 GB of storage. My children don’t need to eat. Not at all.

I can’t stand the thought of someone catching me with any other phone. How embarrassing would that be? No, I much rather them find me in a line for government support than be caught without an iPhone.

Doctor visits and food are the luxuries in life anyways. Now an iPhone, that is something that you can’t live life without. I would DIE if I couldn’t own an iPhone, but I can live without food.

 

Note: This is a satirical post. It is meant for humor, not insult.

 

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